Thursday, August 16, 2012

Leaving Baby Behind

In 6 days we will be leaving our baby behind to take a vacation just the two of us. When I planned this trip a couple months ago I was SO excited. The thought of sleeping in, going out at night, taking naps, general spontaneity was so thrilling. I couldn't wait. And here we are, 6 days out and I am sick just thinking about it.

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I have this knot in my stomach that makes me nauseous when I start to think about leaving Molly. I am getting tears welling up in my eyes as I write this post. Thinking about walking out the door next Wed and not seeing her until the following Monday is heart breaking. How do people do this the first time?

I have been going over and over in my head the things I could say to the airline to get a refund on our non-refundable tickets. I have been trying to figure out how to maybe take a day or two off the length of our trip. I have been planning super exciting and fun things to do on our vacation to try and block out the idea of leaving her. Nothing is working. I am terrified.

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I know that we need this. We need to get away for a few days and have some real alone time. Between my husbands school, my work and taking care of Molly we don't get much uninterrupted time and I know it will be nice. (except I might be bawling my eyes out the entire time) We need a little piece of our old life back, if only just for a few days. We need a little independence and adventure to hold us over for another 9 months until we can get away again.

But geez, I do not want to go.

6 days, six short days to get over it and prepare for a good time. I can do this.

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Moms out there, any tips on getting over the separation and allowing yourself to have a good time?